The Functional Family

What makes a family functional instead of dysfunctional?

1. Parents focus their energy on teaching their children correct principles and allowing the to exercise their agency.

2. Parents intentionally strengthen their families. 

3. Relationships are of supreme importance.

4. Parents are active teachers.

5. Parents lead by example.

I find myself constantly and closely watching other families and parents, getting ideas in my head of how I do and don't want to do things.  {Sometimes I have to catch myself because I feel like I'm being too critical instead of objectively viewing for my own learning and planning.  No one's perfect--especially not me!}  I'm sure we all have a picture in our heads of the family we want to have in the future.  If we never put those ideas on paper and have a concrete plan of how we will live and how our family will function, then we'll find ourselves reacting instead of acting.  "...Circumstances, other people, or old habits [will] end up dictating how [we] respond to a given situation..."  These 5 principles of a functional family come from a magazine article but they really got my brain working.  They are a great start for coming up with our own ideas for our families.  Every time we have an idea of a fun tradition we want to implement, a way of disciplining we want to try, a pattern for daily routines, fun games we want to play regularly... jot them down in a journal! Then make a plan for reviewing the journal regularly.  I'm finding that my "future" family is not so future anymore! My oldest is 2 and she's incredibly observant, a copycat and developing lots of {good and bad} habits.   Here are some questions to get you thinking about what is important to your family.  

Do I want my children to be patient?

Do I want my children to relax, have fun, and learn to enjoy life?

Do I want my children to care about family relationships?

Do I want my children to value health and exercise?

These questions spark a bigger question...Can I recommend to my children that they follow my example both publicly and privately? There is no better time than now to practice the habits that we wish to instill in our children.  Think about what you value most in life.  Make these things a priority in your daily life right now.  Soon you'll find that you are the picture of the family you always dreamed of being.  With awareness, planning and intention, we can all live a pristine life! 

LDS article - Ensign February 2009